consciousness

The Story Of Your Life

The ProphetIn the center of fear, unhappiness, uncertainty, or grief there is a witness.  There is a silent space, so imperceptible that no molecule of pain can penetrate it.

In this space, the witness is you.  You’re in a soft comfortable chair, smiling, as you read a book entitled, “The Story of My Life.”  Even though you haven’t finished it yet, you aren’t worried.  You know that in the end, you turn out just fine.  After all, you are sitting there with the finished copy in your hands, knowing you end up completely whole.

In the thick of turmoil the mind may think it is unnatural to be at peace or to feel gratitude.  But there is nothing more natural, nothing more true, because that peace is you, and you are the truth: you, the silent smiling witness to the adventure of a life in the midst of being lived.

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Life

Healing In The Holy Land


Sea of Galilee
When I introduced myself to the man sitting next to me, who would become my brother on a tour bus that would become our home for ten days in Israel, I mentioned that I wrote for Let Yourself Learn.  He asked me how the blog started and I was brought back to over a year ago when I experienced the traumatic series of events that became the basis for the first trilogy of posts on this site entitled, “The Bed Bug Incident: Parts 1, 2, and 3.”

This WayNot only did those little bugs teach me about inner surrender, acceptance, and becoming comfortable with the unknown, but they also prompted the attempt to manifest my inner lessons into words to be shared with others, that we might mutually benefit from the experience.

A couple of weeks ago I had the opportunity to embark on an adventure in Israel, despite the turmoil in the Middle East, and decided to trust the voice of silence within myself that prompted me to pack my suitcase and head to the airport.

After the first few nights on the trip a couple of the participants suffered from several uncomfortable bug bites.  A visit to the doctor and the verdict was in: pishpeshim.  What were the pishpeshim you ask?  None other than bed bugs themselves.

At the Market

Over a year later, half way around the globe, my pesky spiritual teachers returned with a new lesson.  In the first series of posts for Let Yourself Learn I had been shown the areas within myself that needed healing.  I was relying on non-existent outer security and comfort. I was holding onto pain long after I had experienced it. I allowed the life of my mind to thrive at the expense of my own enjoyment.

Now, in a land of both great pain and unimaginable joy, holy to generation upon generation of human beings, I was being shown the ways in which I had been healed.  The pishpeshim became one of the more hilarious foibles of the group, and the ridiculous amount of education I had acquired about bed bugs from my own experience became beneficial and happily utilized by those who were affected.

The experience of time is but a question: what is good and bad?  The present is the punch line.

Israeli FamilyThe pishpeshim incident was just a small moment in what turned out to be one of the most monumental experiences I have yet to witness in my short life. No story, no combination of words, can express the gratitude of my soul more than the tears of joy that still come to my eyes when I take a moment to notice the overwhelming love from the people I connected with that continues to linger in my heart.

So what was the main lesson that I was being taught by my experience in Israel? I learned that it is impossible to understand the real situation and life experience of a person, a nation, and a society, by mere words uttered in a news program. I learned that the brilliance of our tour guide, Iftah, wasn’t born just of his knowledge and expertise, but of his unwavering request that we remain present. I learned that there is courage, bravery, and the strength to persevere in depths of the human heart that I have yet to penetrate.

Tel AvivBut the lesson that brings tears of gratitude and peace to my being, is that no matter where I go in the world, I can always be loved. Whether we are far from home, or in an unhappy home, the love that is the makeup of our being can be reflected back to us through the eyes of another.

In the post right before I left, I mentioned that inner security is the only true security. But that isn’t entirely true. Outer security can be experienced in the form of love. Our love for one another is our greatest security and our purest freedom.   To all those I encountered on this journey, thank you for your love. Know that I love you more than there are stars in the clear desert sky. And even if you weren’t physically on this journey with me, whenever one is loved, one is loved by all, and I thank you.

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Life

There And Back Again

The AlchemistI’m back and gone all in an instant!  I recently returned home from a soul-soothing trip to Florida, only to embark tomorrow on a ten-day adventure in Israel.

While on the outside this might not look like the “right” time to travel to the Middle East, the opportunity is before me and I’ve accepted.  Most of life’s big leaps never have a “right” time, and waiting can turn into the ultimate comfort zone.  So instead of looking around outside of you to discern the precise moment to take action, take a look within.

In the eternal present of your inner life everything has already unfolded in a manner befitting the perfect organization of the universe that enabled your life to manifest.  If your mind is like mine, decision-making can be an agonizing process.  But beyond the mind, when you inhabit the space of the witness of your being, there are no decisions to be made.  There is only the pure potential for perfect action.

The ultimate security, in a world of unstable forms, is inner security.  Get to know the silence within. Sit back and get really comfortable in the resting place of your being.  From that vantage point the roller coaster of life has a visible track, you are strapped in tight, and each drop and turn is met with enjoyment.

Enjoy your next ten days, please keep me updated on what lessons life is giving you in the comments, and I’ll talk to you soon with quite a tale to tell.

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Life

An Ending, An Insight, And A Vacation

PeaceWhen space is created in your life it can seem as if something has been lost and you are left less than you were before. But contrary to the mind’s idea of space, that opening is the foundation of abundance.

When it comes down to it, an abundance of space is really just the platform on which abundance manifests. I say this as I move into what looks like a wide-open field of possibilities in my own life. My incredible teaching experience that was grant-funded these past four years has reached its end date, and I am humbled with gratitude. Whenever I feel an inner longing towards what was, I know I experienced something to be thankful for, and any bitter-sweetness changes to pure sweetness.

Over a year ago I began planning a vacation to Florida. While I didn’t know at the time what my life was going to look like a year later, the trip is arriving right on schedule. One week ago I had my last day of work, and in one day I leave for a ten-day excursion. The universal schedule is too vast to contain in a mind, but it is prompt and efficient nonetheless! Trusting in time is the same as trusting in the present moment, it is allowing life to exist as it is and consequently aligning your own experience with its perfect unfolding.

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spirituality

Note To Self

Tao of Pooh

When I find myself waiting for the present moment to be a certain way I think of all of the wisdom teachers throughout history in their infinite peace and joy.  I remember that the moment in which they experienced the profundity of existence in such magnitude is the exact same moment I am experiencing right now.  They are all pointing us toward the present, which regardless of form is the birthplace of all enlightenment, if only you let it be.

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Life

How To Perceive Your Own Best Interest

ACIM QuoteI do not perceive my own best interest. This notion use to torment me.  When I first began to see that every small action on my part had a ripple effect, beyond anything I could conceive of, I became worried and unsure of myself.

On a small scale this looks like not being sure which plans to commit to this weekend because it isn’t yet clear what will end up being the most enjoyable option.  On a larger scale this looks like questioning the motives behind a chosen career path, or not being sure if you should commit to a relationship.

What I hadn’t perceived after experiencing an awareness of the infinite effects of my small choices was what those consequences meant for my true best interest.  After a little bit of living it becomes clear that things that are bad at one time can turn out to have positive outcomes, just as something that was first good news can turn into suffering later on. But at a higher vantage point whatever journey the ripple of each action takes there is with it the movement of your highest potential unearthing itself through the inner erosion that takes place one situation after another.

According to A Course In Miracles understanding that you don’t perceive your best interest is an essential step in allowing miracles to occur.  Without this internal judgment of external situations your every moment can transform into the shape it was meant to realize, and with it enact your own best interest.

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Waiting

When Something Feels Wrong

TenebraeDo you ever feel restless, like you are just waiting for some type of change to happen? Do you ever feel like you want to do something more meaningful with your life or just want to feel differently than you do now?

If so, I have good news and bad news.  The good news is, you’re not alone!  The feeling of being disconnected, or just the slight sensation that not everything is as it should be, is a universal human experience.  The bad news is, there is nothing you can do to fix it.  Even if some exciting event were to take place in your life, afterwards you would just be back in the old familiar waiting stage.

The amount of time spent experiencing those pivotal life moments that are tangible and obvious pales in comparison to the waiting period.  There is more good news of course!  You can stop waiting.  To the mind that would seem an impossible task.  After all, it has so many thoughts about the future that it is waiting for, a future that will never come, because when it does it will no longer be the future, it will be the purgatory of the present.  That is the mind’s view of life.

To stop waiting means to stop asking your mind for permission to experience the reality of your present moment.  To stop waiting means to allow yourself to feel what happens when you become present and take away the momentum of your attention from the never ending thought ticker playing across the screen of your consciousness.

It may feel uncomfortable sometimes, but that is only the initial experience of the new layers you’re reaching as you delve just below the surface of your present moment experience.  Much like Harry, Ron, and Hermione had to let go and relax as they were being strangled by Devil’s Snare in order to make their way through to the sorcerer’s stone, there is more than the prickly uncomfortable surface experience.

Next time you feel out of alignment with your highest potential take a deep breath, lean into the initial uncomfortable feeling as you come into the present moment, and settle into what is real.  In this simple and transformative video Eckhart Tolle puts it much more eloquently:

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Life

“It starts with an ending.” – Oberst

CardinalOn my walk home from work I was stopped by the loud conversation of a beautiful red bird with a fellow in a nearby tree.

The next two days mark the end of my four-year journey as a Teaching Artist at a Chicago Public School, and I’ve been finding myself asked daily, “What do you want to do?”

As I stood staring at the radiant body of the red bird I thought, “What is the Cardinal meant to do?” and laughed in spite of myself.

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