It is with a heart full of gratitude for you and your loving presence that I offer a gift of relaxation this Christmas. The video below is a guided relaxation, Shavasana, by yours truly with photography and music by Peter Spero. Thank you to Swami Satchidananda whose version of Shavasana this is based upon, and for many of the wise words and lessons included within it.
Click here for a free download of the audio version of Shavasana with Katie Spero.
Where do your actions arise from? I notice that a great majority of my actions are first thoughts. Sometimes the actions occur so rapidly that I haven’t yet voiced the thoughts in my mind. Sometimes I assume I’m acting from present moment awareness, when in reality I am reacting to a thought. This raises the question, what actions would arise if unprovoked by thoughts and assumptions?
There are many things I know in my mind. I know that the present moment is the only place of true power. I know I only exist right now and will only ever experience this singular now. But just as my actions often arise from thoughts, these truths during periods of my life become only thoughts in my head.
When these spiritual truths are mere thoughts for me I lack all understanding of them; I don’t know what it truly is to live from a place of presence, to act unprovoked by thought, to live free from fear. My mind becomes extremely preoccupied with past and future, and that causes stress and anxiety. Sometimes I’m so afraid I can’t do anything at all.
So what?
I could say that this is where the universe comes in to provide a sign of its reigning presence in my existence and that grace will descend and enable me to let go of all the fear and identification that I grip onto as if my life depended on it. I often speak and learn from comfort. But as “fellow-passengers to the grave, and not another race of creatures bound on other journeys,” as Dickens puts it, I feel it is helpful to express the state of my consciousness in a moment such as this where it seems to burn dimly, when my consciousness lies in the glaring gap between my beliefs and my state of being.
Spiritual truths, when they are just thoughts in your head, cannot change your life experience. Spiritual truths are to be tried, tested, explored, turned upside down, and contended with.
Do you already know that the now is where all peace and joy reside? That won’t mean anything to you until you make an honest effort to test the theory. I can look back at occasions of true presence in my life and know that I had real, miraculous, and deep experiences of peace and oneness with the universe. Yet even now as I look back they are but thoughts in my head. Helpful pointers maybe, but bearing no weight on my current state of consciousness lest I practice that which brought me there in the first place. Lest I practice presence.
I occasionally find that I keep myself distracted from the moment because of the underlying fear within that I would encounter in such a moment of stillness. Yet I know that I do not want fear, and that the facing of it is the only way it will dissipate. There is no way around it. I can only go through.
What do you avoid facing in the stillness of the present moment? What will happen to you if you face it?
Even if it seems unpleasant or unbearable, you will not die. You won’t go anywhere. But that which you had been avoiding through thoughts, emotions, past and future stories, habits, addictions, and to-do lists, will inevitably disappear in the light of your presence. Your true self will always remain.
There is a catch: this concept will remain a mere concept, void of any real meaning, until it is tried, tested, and experienced.
There are a million tiny things we do each day. Some actions are so small and routine we hardly even notice them. Things like taking a breath before drinking a glass of water, blinking our eyes to adjust to daylight after waking up, brushing hair out of our eyes, turning the lights on and off, nodding at a passing stranger, saying “bless you” after someone sneezes. The entire day is composed of minuscule, seemingly insignificant actions.
The following video of an impossible and beautiful display of dominos reminded me that each of us is only seeing from the perspective of one small domino. In each moment we witness a single domino, the present. All amazing feats of humanity, like landing on the moon, the creation of vaccines that cure diseases, and the building of the Sears Tower, are beautiful images like those shown in this video of what happened after all of the dominos had fallen. But their creation was made up of one domino at a time, one small moment, one tiny insignificant action after tiny insignificant action.
When life becomes tedious, and nothing seems to be getting accomplished, think of the domino effect. You are currently witnessing the slow fall of one small domino, which holds the power of the outcome, the vision, the entire purpose of your being here. Even though it seems small and insignificant, you need only take one step, for as the old adage truly states, contained in the one step is the entirety of the journey itself.
Humans are promoters, givers, energy mathematicians. We are always adding the energy behind our actions to a pool of like energy. This can be recognized in negative emotions, which add their “low” energy to negative energy created by painful experiences from the past. Has anyone ever tried to make you laugh when you were upset or angry? In my experience, there is a part of the self in that situation that wants to stay upset. It only wants to feel worse, to add to itself.
Your actions and intentions cast a vote in the energy and experience of the world around you. The energy that creates war multiplies through more war. To diminish the energy of separation and pain, we need to cultivate a higher frequency of energy that creates different outcomes. It is inspiring to hear it so simply put, and well received, in this video that I couldn’t wait to share:
One of my favorite pieces of advice from Eckhart Tolle is to take a few conscious breaths throughout the day. Don’t have a regular meditation practice? No problem! While meditation can be infinitely beneficial, purposely pausing to take a deep breath, whenever you remember to, can create space, clarity, and peace in your daily life. Before you open the fridge, make a phone call, or turn on the car, take one or two deep breaths. Over the course of time you might find your days going smoother, your moments of peace lasting longer, and your intuitive faculties growing stronger. The only way to experience the benefits of taking a few conscious breaths throughout each day, is to test it out!
This video created by my father, Peter Spero, provides a blissful moment of clarity and peace akin to a deep breath. I hope it brings you as much joy and relaxation as it has brought me!
What thoughts take you out of the present moment? For me, when I experience thoughts of fear I find it easy to lose focus on what I’m doing, my attention completely taken up by the train of thought. I was listening to Eckhart Tolle’s A New Earth today and the following passage spoke so truly that it brought me right out of my thinking mind and into the present moment experience. May it do the same for you:
The most important, the primordial relationship in your life is your relationship with the Now, or rather with whatever form the Now takes, that is to say, what is or what happens. If your relationship with the Now is dysfunctional, that dysfunction will be reflected in every relationship and every situation you encounter. The ego could be defined simply in this way: a dysfunctional relationship with the present moment. It is at this moment that you can decide what kind of relationship you want to have with the present moment. (Tolle)
My brilliant and loving father, Peter Spero, created both the footage and music for this short peaceful getaway entitled “15 Seconds of Peace #1.” My parents and grandparents have always appreciated the beauty of nature. What is so fascinating about the natural world, is that it too is alive; yet without the separation created by the thinking mind, it is one with life. Trees, plants, animals, they live and die in complete alignment and peace of being. They never project themselves outside of the present moment.
We too can experience the peace of nature by relinquishing the rapt attention on our thoughts, and being one with the moment we are living in. I hope that today this video gives you an experience of the infinite peace available to us all in the present:
Have you ever seen or heard something that seemed like it was meant just for you? Last night I parked behind a car with the bumper sticker, “Don’t Believe Everything You Think.” What a wonderful message from the universe! Peace has room to grow in your life once you stop taking your thoughts so seriously.
I have been more stressed out recently, from work and moving, than I usually ever am. But once I stop believing in all of the worry thoughts, I have more space for peace and joy to rise. The practice is moment to moment. When I find myself pacing around a room, with my shoulders up to my ears, I have a new opportunity to take a deep breath and let go of my attachment to my thoughts. When I start thinking of everything I have to do, and feel the heat of stress rising in my belly, I take a deep breath, and surrender to the present moment once more. When I hear the din from the train and am about to freak out about moving to a place where I’ll have to hear it everyday, I take a deep breath, and remind myself how grateful I am to be so close to transportation.
In a new apartment, no matter how perfect and wonderful it is, it’s easy to see all of the little things that are wrong with it. What situations in your life provoke the voice of complaint? The easiest way to combat the voice of complaint is gratitude. Whenever I hear the voice in my head complaining, I try to replace it with a list of the things I am grateful for. I am grateful for my bedroom. I am grateful to have a shower. I am grateful for the stove. I am grateful to be under a roof. The list is infinite, and the best part is that it replaces the voice of the ego attempting to sabotage the peace of presence.
Next week I’m moving for the first time in five years. My boyfriend and I have loved living in this little studio apartment all these years, but several months ago (even before the bed bug incident) I began having a strong desire for something new. Something with a bedroom.
The last time I re-signed my current lease I had some doubts, the inkling that I might want to live somewhere new. But I was comfortable living here, and the price was affordable for my boyfriend and I. Then one day I watched an Oprah’s Next Chapter episode that took place in India and featured a family of five living in a studio apartment much smaller than ours, which I had previously considered tiny. I took this as a sign that I should stay in the apartment, that it was relatively large, and more than enough for just the two of us.
One of the blessings of staying here for a fifth year, is that now moving feels like a gift. I am infinitely grateful. Yet, even as my dream is coming true before my eyes, I am still trying to figure out how it will be realized. I know come September 1st I’ll be sleeping in a different apartment, but I haven’t yet figured out how. There is a huge list of tasks that must be accomplished; I can’t keep track of them all.
Can you feel it? I’m right at that point where I can choose to react, or to allow. It would be easy to let the “how” take over the enjoyment of this highly anticipated change. This is a transition I have dreamt about for months, and I am grateful it is finally coming to pass. So no matter how impossible getting a dishwasher into a car and up a flight of stairs seems, I choose to let myself enjoy the experience.
Is there anything going on for you right now that you can surrender to? For me, moving is an experiment in letting go. The easiest way to tell if you’ve actually surrendered, and aligned yourself with your present experience, is to ask yourself if you feel peaceful or stressed out. If you’re feeling stressed, that is a compass letting you know you should turn around and go in a different direction. It gives you another chance to say, “I am going to allow this situation to be as it is,” and find out how life unfolds.
For the final day of the “1 new thing a day challenge,” I went to the Chicago Air and Water Show for the first time. This picture is courtesy of a fleet of skywriters.
Human minds always have a “fall back.” The mind’s “fall back” is a pattern that it is used to, that has become habitual. For example, I would say that my mind’s “fall back” is worry. When something happens, whether it is an undesirable situation or an experience that cannot be understood, my mind will fall back into the worry pattern. It comes up with scenarios of increasingly disturbing outcomes.
Tonight my apartment buzzer rang and it was the UPS man. But when I got downstairs there was no package and no UPS man to be seen. Who had I buzzed into my apartment building? I did not have the answer to that question so my mind decided to fall back into its comfortable worry pattern. What is your mind’s “fall back?”
I took a nap, and realized I was still worried after I woke up. I then decided to ask the universe a question. Asking questions to God, the universe, the “field of potentiality” (as Pam Grout calls it), or whatever word you use, is a readily accessible life tool. I needed to know everything was okay. I asked, “Please give me a clear sign tonight, before I fall asleep, that everything is okay.” I proceeded to peruse ridiculously expensive couches on the internet, but still had my request in the background of my attention. A few hours later I checked my email per my usual routine. Right at the top of the list read the subject line, “Don’t Worry.” Inside was this message:
We worry over all kinds of things. If you can’t get the right nail polish color, you worry. Everything causes worry. You don’t have to have a crash in the stock market or some other financial crisis to make you miserable. Just one little pimple is enough to cause you to go into a tailspin—as if nobody has ever had it or it’s going to be there permanently. There seems to be so much stress in modern life: ‘I have to do this. I have to do that.’ Yes, you may have responsibilities, but the first and foremost responsibility is to take care of you. If you can’t take care of yourself, how can you take care of others? So, have faith and confidence: ‘I’m going to change the situation. I have the strength to face and overcome anything.’ Worry never helps anyone.
God bless you. Om Shanti, Shanti, Shanti. (Swami Satchidananda)
The email was from the Satchidananda Ashram which sends out “Weekly Words of Wisdom.” This one arrived right on time. The feelings of worry were transmuted into peace; the sign I received was sufficient to break my rapt attention on a mind in the midst of a worry cycle.
What is your “fall back?” Next time you notice the mind reverting to its habitual thinking patterns try asking a question. You can even just ask for help. While no one knows how the questions will be answered, it will be interesting to watch and find out.
Let Yourself Learn 