Tag Archives: Thoughts

Inspiration

Pests or Purses?

PursesRecently I’ve spotted a couple scary looking millipede-esq bugs creeping around the corners of the ceiling in my new apartment.  These bugs aren’t new to me, they’re everywhere in Chicago.  I even had them in my old apartment, but they are relatively harmless and only show up one at a time.  As some of you might know, I have a history with bug infestation, and thankfully this is not one of those situations.  After living through a real infestation, the occasional bug isn’t too disturbing to me.  At least, that is what I have been telling myself.

The reality of the situation is that since I have seen a few of these bugs I now am looking for them.  I scan the walls to check if there are any creepy crawlers.  The law of attraction is a powerful tool, whether used consciously or not.  So how do I let go of this new, yet ever so familiar, neurosis?  Surrender can transform any situation, but the way I scan the room makes it clear that I haven’t surrendered.  Which is why I’ve decided to replace what I’m looking for.

Recently I’ve been attracted to metallic purses.  I made the decision, that every time my eyes drift towards the ceiling I’m going to replace the image of my many-legged nemesis with the image of a beautiful silver purse.  Yes, this sounds silly, but it is transforming an unpleasant situation containing the burden of past experience, to a pleasant experiment in manifestation.  Will my silver purse actually find its way into my life?  Whether it shows up physically or not, the living room of my mind is free of infestation and filled with beauty.

What negative situations are you unconsciously looking for?  Whether it is a worry situation, a negative self-image, or the oh so common “waiting for the other shoe to drop in times of joy” syndrome, see what you can replace with a positive image or thought.  Nothing will be lost by replacing these negative thoughts, which pretend to be all-important, besides the negative outcomes they create.  What can be gained?  The only way to find out is to give it a try.

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spirituality

Are you giving away what you don’t have?

GiftsYesterday I cited the old adage, “The more you give, the more you get.”  While this is true, it requires a disclaimer: you can only give what you have.  In concrete terms, this means that if you are giving away heaps of money on a credit card, money that you don’t actually possess, then you will not end up receiving.  Instead, that which you borrowed will end up being taken from you one way or another.  Part of the accumulation of financial debt is simply giving what you do not have.

This principle also operates in relationships.  If you are always trying to help others, give them advice and a shoulder to cry on, but never ask for assistance yourself, you are giving away what you don’t have.  I love the way Brené Brown put it when talking to Oprah about giving and receiving help: if you give help freely, but consider yourself a person that doesn’t ask for help, then every time you are giving help to someone you are judging them.  You are saying, “It is okay for you to ask for help, but not me.  I’m not the kind of person that does that.”  To give genuinely, you must first possess.

This also comes up in love relationships.  I’ve heard many times that you must first love yourself before you love others.  But what does that actually mean?  To figure that out I look at the way I treat myself.  When I forgive myself for making mistakes, have compassion for my shortcomings, comfort myself in times of grief, and let myself laugh and be joyful every single day, I can see that I am truly loving myself.  It is a lot easier to refrain from criticizing your partner for gaining a couple pounds, than it is yourself.  That is where the practice of loving yourself comes in.  The more compassion you can exercise on yourself, the more genuinely your compassion will be experienced by others.

Yesterday at the grocery store my thoughts attempted to gain my attention by worrying about the price of my groceries.  Worry is a common pattern for the mind.  But going into the grocery store I knew I had enough money in my bank account to buy groceries.  I knew that I wasn’t borrowing money from the credit card company that I didn’t already have at my disposal.  Of course, that doesn’t matter to the mind, which attempts to use any situation to place itself firmly at the center of your attention, often through negative reactions. So I allowed myself to enjoy the exchange of giving and receiving.

The first step in giving is to check your bank account.  How much love do you have in your bank account?  How much gratitude?  How much forgiveness?  Your funds will only be depleted if you are giving what you don’t have.  Start with yourself.  Practice gratitude and self-forgiveness.  If it is physical money that is an issue for you in the exchange of energy, create some savings; pay yourself before you pay everyone else.  Whether physical or spiritual, you can only give what you already have.  And once you have, and start becoming part of the exchange, there is no end to the growth of giving and receiving you can experience.

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Inspiration

Lighten Up!

As I stood in the line at the grocery store today I felt the tug of worry on my attention saying, “I wonder how much this is all going to cost.  What if it is more than I expected?  Will I be able to afford it?”  I smiled at the thoughts; they jockey so diligently for their position in my attention.

Smiling at yourself helps take away the seriousness of the constant stream of mind, which often turns to negative scenarios when left to its own devices.  I decided to choose a different reaction, rather than falling back on the comfortable pattern of worry.  I chose to be grateful that I was taking place in the exchange.

The more you give the more you receive; every action has an equal and opposite reaction.  So as I paid for my groceries I smiled.  Not only did the smile lead to a nice exchange with the man checking out the groceries, but it made me feel lighthearted and grateful to take part in the cycle of giving and receiving.  Lightening up leads to more joy, more reasons to smile.  I hope this video gives you as much joy and lightheartedness as it gave me!

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Inspiration

What are you looking for?

While this video originally served as a PSA for being aware of cyclists, and is absolutely hilarious, I found it to contain a great spiritual truth.  That is, if you aren’t looking for something, you are not going to see it.  When creating the reality you desire the first step is deciding what you are looking for.  Is it a compliment?  A deep conversation?  A Buggati?  Whatever it is you currently desire, look for it everywhere.  Don’t decide where the best place to look for it is.  Look up at the sky, look at the train passing by, look over your shoulder at the grocery store.  You don’t have to come up with the “how,” all you have to do is decide what you are searching for and go out there expecting to see it everywhere!

Thanks Marc and Angel Hack Life for sharing this video!

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consciousness

Don’t Let It Go To Your Head

WinterNegative emotions are low frequency energy currents that pass through the body, and often surface from within the body if they weren’t fully felt and “digested” when they were created.  I sometimes feel negative emotions unconnected to thoughts, which surface randomly.  They are uncomfortable.  But they can also be dispelled.  The trick is, don’t let negative emotions go to your head.

It is easy to not want to feel negative energy currents and try to numb them, or come up with various schemes about how to rid yourself of those emotions.  When this happens, thoughts end up feeding the negative energy currents with more energy of a like frequency, creating a cycle of negativity within the body.  Not only do thoughts create more negative emotions, but they also prevent them from being dispelled.

When I feel negative energy rising up within me I find the most helpful way through it is allowing myself to feel the emotions fully.  I let myself sit with them.  It is not comfortable, but it is also not difficult when I tell myself that it is okay to feel negative emotions.  There is nothing inherently wrong with feeling “bad.”  I give myself permission to feel what I’m feeling, without trying to explain it away or come up with a solution.

Negative emotions are just another frequency of energy we can experience.  So I let myself have the experience.  By accepting what I’m feeling in the moment, space is created around the emotions.  I don’t give more energy to the negativity by wrapping myself up in it, and letting it feed my thoughts.  Instead of becoming the negative emotions, I experience them.  (This didn’t happen overnight, it is an ongoing practice!)

As an energy current, negative emotions naturally try to feed and grow, but this can be prevented by retaining the awareness that they don’t actually help.  I know that feeling bad isn’t going to make me feel better, or improve my circumstances.  Only high frequency energy can take me where I want to go.  So even as I’m feeling the emotions fully, I am aware that I needn’t let it go to my head, because after they pass through I will once more be on my way to feeling peaceful.  One of the most life changing observations I learned from Tolle is that behind all negative emotions is the belief that they will somehow get you what you want.  But they can only feed on the same low frequency of energy that they are, and cannot improve your circumstances.  What happens when you have a surge of negative emotions?  Does it trigger your thinking mind?  Next time you experience a “bad” feeling, see what happens when you allow it to be there.  It may pass through quicker than you think.

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Inspiration

How To Reap The Benefits Of Meditation Without Meditating

FlowersOne of my favorite pieces of advice from Eckhart Tolle is to take a few conscious breaths throughout the day. Don’t have a regular meditation practice?  No problem! While meditation can be infinitely beneficial, purposely pausing to take a deep breath, whenever you remember to, can create space, clarity, and peace in your daily life.  Before you open the fridge, make a phone call, or turn on the car, take one or two deep breaths.  Over the course of time you might find your days going smoother, your moments of peace lasting longer, and your intuitive faculties growing stronger.  The only way to experience the benefits of taking a few conscious breaths throughout each day, is to test it out!  

This video created by my father, Peter Spero, provides a blissful moment of clarity and peace akin to a deep breath.  I hope it brings you as much joy and relaxation as it has brought me!

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consciousness

“Stop Trying to Read Other People’s Minds”

Rolling CloudsHas someone ever told you an assumption they had about you, and you thought, “Where did that even come from?”  Several times throughout my life friends have regaled to me their thoughts about my actions and motivations that had nothing to do with my actual experience.  When you’re on this end of an assumption, it is easy to see how inaccurate and unnecessary assumptions are.  At worst, assumptions can be destructive and hurtful.

It is a lot harder to notice assumptions when you’re the one assuming.  I am positive I make several unconscious assumptions every day.  For example, when I’m choosing a TV show to watch at night I’ll think, “My boyfriend doesn’t want to watch this.”  Or when I’m talking to a friend I might think, “They don’t want to hear this piece of advice or story that I have.”  Assumptions are like a cancer, they multiply without discretion, until they destroy whatever they were attempting to create.

In this video from Super Soul Sunday Don Miguel Ruiz, author of The Four Agreements, lays out the roots of assumption and how to control those thoughts:

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Inspiration

“Who is it that’s aware that I’m thinking?” – Jim Carrey

I love this video of Jim Carrey because it reminds me that I have no idea what is truly going on inside other people.  We are each on an epic journey of personhood, each the star of our own play.  It is a beautiful thing to be invited to hear about the journey of another.  It is also wonderful to recognize that you don’t know the journey of another.  For me the “not knowing” helps to quell judgment, and allow people to present themselves in a way I couldn’t have imagined.  Thank you Jim Carrey, and Eckhart Tolle for sharing this inspiring video!

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consciousness

The Spice Girls Situation

Elementary Aged Katie

I ditched school in the fourth grade to see the Spice Girls with a friend and her older sister.  We waited outside in the freezing Chicago winter for hours and they never showed.  Worse still, as I arrived at school the next day all of my classmates were telling me how mad the teacher was that I had ditched.  I loved my fourth grade teacher.  She was a comfort and inspiration.  I am positive that I went on to study poetry in college because of her influence.  She read us poems that she had written to her mother, who had passed away.  She even cried in front of us.

I had never met another adult, who I wasn’t related to, who I felt so strongly connected to.  So on that shameful day after the botched Spice Girls escapade I felt lower than I had ever felt in my short life.  The second I saw her face I started to cry.  At that moment she held me tight in her arms and let me know everything was okay, she had just been worried about me.  She was loving, forgiving, and had expressed none of the anger my classmates had described.  But the idea of letting her down was traumatic.  It was so traumatic that I still remember the scene vividly in my mind’s eye even now as an adult.  And yet, this was not a traumatizing situation.  Now I think it’s pretty awesome that I skipped out on school to see the best band ever.  But in future, anytime a teacher showed the slightest sign of disapproval there was nothing I could do to keep from crying.

I remember getting a C on an important Spanish test in high school and running out of the room lest my teacher see how ridiculously distraught I had become.  The positive side effect of wanting to please my teachers was my straight A record in school.  Deeper than that is an issue common to many people, in many walks of life: the need to please.  For me, my need for approval came from the story that I told myself about how bad it felt when a teacher was angry with me.  My actions were motivated by trying to mitigate an imagined pain.

The stories we tell ourselves, and believe in, have tremendous power to shape our behavior and our lives.  What stories do you tell yourself? While not all stories are negative or fearful, such as “I am awesome and can do anything I put my mind to,” they still cannot compare to reality.  It is impossible to get a true experience of reality when it is seen and felt through the filter of a story in your mind. 

I can see in my own life that I could be held back, from relinquishing stories about myself, because of the fear of what life would really be like.  I might think that living out life according to a story I have about my life will protect me from something worse.  The problem with that logic is that it’s just another story.  True expansion, freedom, and possibility await right on the other side of your story.  The mind might feel lost, because you are letting go of thought forms, but you know that you are not your mind.  And no loss of thought, opinion, or story actually has any power to take away from you, because you are life itself.  You are the platform that allows stories to arise.

I never quite got over my need to please my professors; I ended up Suma Cum Laude in college.  But getting good grades never did anything to increase my learning, creativity, or fulfillment.  I only gained the temporary high of meeting the needs of the story I was telling myself about having to get good grades.  Life went on after my school years ended.  Those grades don’t mean anything anymore.  All that I am left with is my true self; greater than any story I could ever tell, and more abundant than any need I could ever conceive of.

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Inspiration

“In the moment of seeing, of noticing that your relationship with the Now is dysfunctional, you are present.” – Tolle

Wind Tunnel

The first day of teaching for a new year of the after school program always leaves me thinking, “what just happened?”  Now sitting on a comfortable couch at home, I see the pull to hang on to the day.  To stay in the stress, to worry about what it will be like tomorrow.  But when I think about how I felt about the new year of programming this morning, before it at all began, I know I wasn’t worried at all.  I didn’t feel stressed about the prospect of the next class.

Even though the day has a magnetic pull, I can see that feeling like I did this morning would be a much more enjoyable way of being.  I can also see that feeling present and without worry didn’t effect the reality of the experience as it actually occurred.

Worry or not, the outcome is always the same.  The moment always comes to pass.  This is the moment where I have the opportunity to choose again.  Instead of succumbing to the attraction of holding on, I can choose to put down the thoughts of past and future, and return to the only place I will ever be, the present.

How do you feel when the day is done?  If you ever find yourself reliving the day over again in your head, create an experiment out of putting the day down, and allowing yourself to just be where you are.  After all, the only way to see if it feels better than a previous way of being, is to experience it.

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